Have you ever wondered what your life would have been like had you been where you are today in your faith, say, 15 years ago or even 20 years ago? Of course, hindsight is always 20-20, but I'm talking about more than hindsight. I'm talking about embracing your faith to the point where you can just rest in God's love and know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that He has everything under control. That is where I feel I am today, and while I don't have it all together spiritually, I feel that I have finally come to a point where I realize how detrimental "worry" has been in my relationship with God. For me, it has been one of the largest hurdles to overcome in my faith journey, but in the last 2 - 3 years, my heart and soul have changed for the better. One of the key factors in this change within has come as a result of my committing to reading God's Word on a daily basis. This has made a HUGE impact on how I view God, myself and my world. Another key factor has been women who have supported me in that endeavor, as well as my husband's example when it comes to trusting God to take care of all the details in any scenario.
Today God showed me in a very small situation (in comparison to the grand scheme of things), that He really does have my life worked out and He answered an unspoken prayer with, "Kimmy, I've got it taken care of," before I even got a chance to ask for His help. He is truly an amazing God and he cares about the small stuff too.
I know I cannot go back in time, but I wonder how different my life would have been had I been immersed in His Word and trusting Him more when I was younger. I have spent useless hours worrying about things that I had absolutely no control over; I have spent useless hours believing Satan's lies about myself and others, only to reject God's blessings that He so desperately wanted to show me, I'm sure. I have spent useless hours complaining and lamenting over situations that I should have been looking to be thankful in rather than focusing on the negative.
Our spiritual journey is exactly that--a journey. Journeys are full of surprises that we do not expect. Journeys are full of blessings we don't plan on. Journeys can also entail grueling hardships along the way. Journeys might be well-planned with hopes of well-intended results to a destination that is known. Some destinations might be unknown. I know what the ultimate destination of my journey is and that makes me shiver to the bone as I hope for and look forward to my eternal life with my Creator and Father in Heaven.
There are many unexplained things on my journey and I'm sure more are to come. However, I feel like I've got a new lease on this life that God has blessed me with. Each year is a blessing that I do not want to take for granted. I love the process by which God has brought me to this place. It hasn't been easy, but it's been worth it. And I know it is only going to get better.
Today, I am thankful for . . .
115. The gift of Prayers Answered Before They Were Even Spoken.
116. The gift of Knowing God is in Control.
117. The gift of My Journey.