Friday, May 28, 2010

Guess What? I'm just going to write and forget about everything else that needs to be done around here . . .

I am overwhelmed!

Let me explain why.

1.  I have brand new, amazing walnut-colored laminate floor in my living/dining room area, thanks to my wonderful husband who has spent many hours doing the install on his own.  It's been a relatively slow process, as he has just been working at it a few boards at a time whenever he has a spare moment.  He is hoping to start and finish the kitchen area tomorrow, but he pulled/strained a muscle in his back yesterday and he's not too sure how well his back will be feeling tomorrow.  Installing laminate floor is hard on a body . . . or so he tells me!

2.  As a result of this recent renovation project . . . yes, you guessed right, I'm sure . . . my house is in a state of chaos!  And this Sunday I am hosting a family birthday party for my son Ty and my older nephew (they share birthdays only a week or so apart); plus, I've got two extra kids here this weekend and if I haven't already mentioned it, my house is in a state of chaos.  Oh yeah.  I did mention that.  But it seems like I'm always mentioning that.  Maybe that's just the new Kimmy.  Messy, Chaotic Kimmy!  Well, the house will be what it's going to be and there's not much I can do about it.  Sorry, family!

3.  It has been raining.  And raining.  And raining.  As a result, I have not yet planted my straw bale garden, nor planted my straw potatoes.  If we don't get some sunshine soon, I'm not sure that I'll have any produce at the end of summer, which is par for the course around here, but this year I was hoping it was going to be different, given the fact that I am trying out a new type of gardening.  I will post separately about my straw bale garden later; that is, if I ever get it completed!  The bales do require moisture in order to grow things, but really, this is getting ridiculous!

4.  On to something more exciting . . . my son, Mitchell, performed in his final band concert of the year this past Wednesday.  The band consists of students from approximately 6 surrounding area schools, and he was awarded the Most Outstanding Woodwind Award for a beginner band student in those schools.  Despite my efforts to try to discourage him from continuing on in band next year (due to the fact that he doesn't practice!), I think my efforts to do so are futile.  They were probably futile all along, but now that he's won this award he wants to continue in band more now than ever before.  However, he has decided that he will deviate from the flute half-way through next year and switch to the saxophone.  Apparently the fingering is the same for both instruments, so the transition should be pretty easy for him.  In any case, his dad and I are very proud of him.  Who knew we'd have a flutist in our family?

5.  I am getting excited over ministry opportunities that I'm currently involved in.  I mentioned a while back that I am part of a BOOK Club at our church . . . it's a club for women that encourages daily Bible reading.  Provided that we have enough newcomers to the group in fall, I will be leading a group of women in one of these Clubs!  The leader approached me several months ago and asked me to pray about this opportunity and it didn't take long for me to agree to help.  I've also had the opportunity to develop a blog devoted to our BOOK Clubs and it's been so cool to watch that all unfold.  I have also recently begun to mentor a younger mom in our church.  Another ministry that I am fully devoted to is something called The Bridge, which is group consisting of grade 5 and 6 students (mostly from our church) who meet together once a month for socializing and a fun activity.  We had our wind-up for the 2009-2010 year tonight and I am looking forward to what next year holds.  Since Mitchell will be in grade 6 next year, it will be his last year in this program, but then Ty gets to attend for two years; so, it looks like I've got three more years to help out with this ministry.  My current role is that of Coordinator, so I kind of get to oversee everything.  It feels like a daunting task, but yet I have such a passion for it that I am encouraged and energized all at once by having the opportunity to be involved in the lives of these kids.

6.  Now the sad news, which has left me sobbing inside.  I received word this week that effective June 30th, I will no longer have a job at our school.  Due to government funding cut-backs, my profession is receiving a huge downsize in our province.  Cuts to individual schools were made based on seniority, and since I was the last one hired at our school, I was the first to go.  One other colleague has also lost her job.  More jobs may be cut down the road.  It is very sad.  The students who need the extra help are the ones who will suffer as a result of this government decision.

I do have some seniority over other E.A.s in a neighboring community, but even that idea (of exercising my seniority so that I can be transferred to a different school) doesn't look too promising.  Hopefully next week I'll have some answers to that dilemma.

I say dilemma because that is really, truly what I face right now.  I LOVE my job.  And I mean LOVE it.  I have never had a job that I am so passionate about.  I never dread going to work.  I like the people I work with.  I feel valued and needed where I work.  I have never received so much personal satisfaction from a job.  Ever.  Which is why it grieves me so much to lose my job.  Before this, I had never been laid-off from a job.  The job cut was not personal.  It was a numbers game and I had the wrong number.  But I feel like some part of me has been lost as a result of my losing my job.  It's a hard feeling to explain.  I just wish I didn't feel this way.  I feel lost.  I do not know where to go from here and it's very unsettling.

Along with the stress of losing my job, I just found out that I will be short 22.5 hours to qualify for Employment Insurance after my job officially ends.  Because I received a significant reduction in hours last year, I have not accumulated the 665 hours I need in order to get E.I.  And the crazy thing is, I have "donated" time in excess of 22.5 hours to the school by staying late, arriving early, attending meetings and workshops, etc.  But those are not insurable hours and insurable hours is what the government requires me to prove.  Poor me.

Despite everything I have said regarding my job loss, I do know that God is in control and He must have a different plan for my life.  I just don't know how or why that plan does not include my going to work where I do right now.  The only other thing I know I would enjoy doing at this time in my life is baking and decorating cakes, and sewing baby receiving blankets and burp cloths.  I don't know how that's going to be replacement income.  But if I had a choice, and being an E.A. were not an option, that's what I'd choose to do.  Bake and sew for profit.

7.  Well, if you've made it this far . . . CONGRATULATIONS!  This was a very long post, which could have been expanded into seven smaller posts, but you know me--I kind of enjoy getting off on a tangent every now and then.  So, thanks for reading.  And please keep me in your prayers as I seek God's will regarding my employment status.


stacey said...

First, how exciting about new floors and fun awards! Just think of the messes as extra seating for your guests!!

Second, I will pray that God has something even better for you! Have you thought about approaching families with children with special needs and offering to be an aide/shadow/mentor on a private basis?

~Rain``` said...

Wow, lots of stuff going on. Kimmy, I am sorry to hear about the job. I know you really enjoy what you do. Plus, you are EXCELLENT at it. You are the type of E.A. I'd LOVE in my classroom. I am praying for a miracle, that God will provide another job for you that is fulfilling! Our Lord WILL provide for your needs.

michelle said...

Oh, please don't shut your blog down Kimmy!!! I'm still here and still reading. It was Memorial Day weekend her, so we have been busy, but I saved this post to come back to when I had a few minutes so that I could comment on some of the things you mentioned.

First off...the flooring. I feel your husband's pain (and your excitement to see things come together). My husband and I worked together to lay flooring throughout our entire basement. (I really need to do a blog post about that entire experience.) It is hard work and it took us a lot of evenings/weekends to get it all done, especially with a baby to entertain while we worked. We would work for three hours, look back at what we had done, and feel like we had hardly made any progress across the area we were working on. It is so worth it in the end though.

Secondly, I also feel your "pain" about your house being in chaos. I like my house organized and put together. It is easier to clean that way and keeps me sane. However, we have just moved from one project to the next during the six or so years that we have lived here and the mess just seems to move around with it. I call it the domino effect...if the basement gets done, then the office can be moved downstairs, which means the upstairs office can be turned into a nursery, which means that Isaac can move his belongings out of our master bedroom, which means I will be able to put our stuff away in our get the idea. Anyway, we are still in the midst of the domino drop and I don't know when it will be finished. Honestly, I just want all of the junk out of my dining room.

I have never heard of straw bale gardening until you mentioned it and I had to look it up. I must say that I am intrigued. For us this year, it looks like our garden will not be more than the three volunteer potatoes that are growing in our compost pile.

My congrats to Mitchell!!! And my condolences to you on losing your job. Having taught in small-town Saskatchewan, I know how much people like you put into your positions and how important you are to the students you help. I truly hope that something comes open for you, regardless of what the situation looks like right now.

Okay...this got a little long winded, but I don't get to write to you much. Enjoy your summer.


Kimmie said...

made it and sending a hug Kimmy. Change is sometimes hard, but always good when we keep our eyes of Jesus.

mama to 8
one homemade and 7 adopted

Chris said...

*yay for flooring - fabulous to wash a REAL floor!

*flute-guys are called flautists... Gordon Korman has several books that mention the title, which make me smile just remembering the Bugs Potter books.

*sorry to hear about the job cut. That stinks. What we don't know is what will await you around the corner! God hasn't left you stranded and still wants your trust... keep pedaling hard and He will continue to take you on many adventures. Sometimes He wants us to rest too, and do the pedaling for us! I'm praying tonight for comfort and peace for you and Wayne about your future.

*Cool to see the many areas you are serving in! I have a chance to speak at Redberry ranch camp this summer... nervous but excited. Seems God is using me in many young women's ministries areas... scary, but fun.

*ps.- glad you came back!