Monday, June 25, 2007

My Own Personal Wonder Years

This month has been really busy. But it's been busy with my boys, and that makes the busyness all worthwhile. I feel so privileged to be able to attend field trips with my boys; to help out at their track-and-field; to volunteer in their classroom; to be casually employed where they go to school; to watch them play sports; to see them revel in our great outdoors; to attend birthday parties with them; to plan parties for them.

I am so blessed! I almost feel guilty for being able to have shared this month with them in such abundance. Not all moms have these opportunities. Next year will be much different for us, since Ty will be moving on to grade one and therefore will be at school every day instead of just every-other-day.

Wayne and I watched an episode of The Wonder Years this afternoon before he had to go to work and I cried when it was over. The name of the episode was Mom Wars, and it was about Kevin and his mom "letting go" of each other. Well, it was about Kevin being frustrated by his mother's "mothering" of him, and her having to come to terms with the fact that her baby son was growing up. I saw so much of myself in Norma Arnold (the mother) and could totally relate to her feelings. I have a tendency to do that. I get emotionally involved with the characters on T.V. shows or movies. It's ridiculous, but I've always been this way. Remember The Littlest Hobo? Well, I even related to the dog in that show! I was always crying at the end of The Littlest Hobo. I felt sorry for Hobo because he never knew where he'd be going next, where his next meal would come from, or how much he was loved and appreciated for his acts of heroism.

Anyways, not that I want to go off on a tangent about T.V. show characters, but watching The Wonder Years made me nostalgic for my boys' youth. They're not that old yet, but I'm already dreading the day that they "grow up" for good. Do you know what I mean? I'm not dealing well with this now . . . how will I ever face reality in the years ahead? And believe me, I certainly do not want to be an overbearing mother to my adult children, unable to cut-the-apron strings so-to-speak. But I can't help but feel a bit sad today as I reflect on how my boys are growing up so quickly. Ty's had tremendous growth this year in his ability to "let go" of me. Mitchell's getting better and better at that concept all the time. And although Thomas and I have not experienced a deep mother-son connection, he is still so dear to me and I see him branching out and growing up too. He has a job for Pete's sake! I didn't have a job until I was 18 years old. He's only 16 and he's already working.

Before Wayne realized I was crying as a result of the show, he said, "Honey, do you think you could learn a few things from this episode?" Oh, could I ever! And once Wayne did realize how much the show had affected me, he just held my in his arms and let me cry about how sad I was that the boys have to grow-up. I would imagine that in the years ahead of us he'll be required to do this a whole lot more!


Lovella said...

such a delight to find a friend who's sister shares mine. How fun. I know one other gal that shares my name and the first time we met we just kind of looked at each other, it was almost strange.
Your post today, made me smile. It wasn't that long ago that I was in your shoes and wanted to let go and not . .all at the same time. It's been amazing how the Lord has provided the ability to do that when the time was right. We also don't want to be intrusive in our adult kids lives, and yet, I'll always be a mom . .just to a few more now. Such fun.
It's funny how you live in Sask and that is where my parents lived for many years before my time.
We are on the west coast. I'll be back for sure.

Lori said...

I am going through the letting go phase again in my life. Two times in the last few months. My daughter moved to Texas in April. She is on a wonderful adventure with her grandparents. My son will be going to the Navy on August 21st. Just the thought of him not being around everyday, not being able to talk with him, do his laundry, get him a glass of water. Oh how sad!

Kristy brags you a a lot so I thought I'd pop over and see for myself what a wonderful person you are.

Kimmie said...


Sending you a hug (((((hug))))) and reminding you of the Grace that God has for us. He will give it to you when you need it, try not to look ahead, but enjoy the wonderful husband you have (truly, a man that comforts his wife is a treasure!) AND your sons. Sounds like you have wonderful relationships and that God will continue to grow them and bless you (all!)
I am a sensitive soul too- want to come over and we can cry together. (I think Lovella would love to join in the cry...she is a sensitive heart girlie too!)

mama to 6
one homemade and 5 adopted

e-Mom said...

I'm getting caught up here at your blog tonight. My husband just LOVES the Wonder Years. I've watched a few episodes with him lately, and I can see why he does. I of course relate to Winnie, his girlfriend. I can certainly appreciate though how you would totally identify with the Mom. Like you, I have cried at every transition... when my kids went to kindergarten, got on a bus to go to Jr. High, entered high school, and graduated from college. (Still one more year to go.) The pre-school years dragged, but they sped by latterly. I noticed that each good-bye brought with it, a wonderful hello too. I assume the cyle will never end, as our daughter moved out this spring (tears, good-bye) but she may be marrying within a year or two (smiles, hello).

Big hugs, and just let the tears flow. Tomorrow will feel better. e-Mom

jillarae said...

The Littlest Hobo made me cry every time too...