tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7278234574421715715.post5575389229413512730..comments2024-03-07T20:56:29.901-07:00Comments on Mission: Kim-Possible!: Defiance and DisrespectKimmyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10475879852203788006noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7278234574421715715.post-1630204645674399672008-05-28T20:12:00.000-06:002008-05-28T20:12:00.000-06:00"The Out of Sync Child" is an awesome book, but i ..."The Out of Sync Child" is an awesome book, but i don't think it's your solution - a good read though just for general behavior awareness.<BR/><BR/>My intial response to your concerns here is that boys will be boys. and you need to let them be boys. being your child's advocate means loving them, focusing on the positive more than the negatives, and trying to find simple solutions to some of the negatives. we find that the more positive time we spend with our kids, the less negative behaviors there are, and the easier they are to deal with. <BR/><BR/>I also think we compare our kids too much and think too highly of other mothers!! have confidence in yourself and your parenting - don't let yourself feel judged b/c you know your sons best and what their needs are. you are a good mom, keep telling yourself that.degsieshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11892857104285912990noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7278234574421715715.post-75569655510254295982008-04-30T23:51:00.000-06:002008-04-30T23:51:00.000-06:00the advice here is great. hugs hugs to you!xo ~Kthe advice here is great. <BR/><BR/>hugs hugs to you!<BR/><BR/>xo ~KKarla Porter Archerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12852059935122763051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7278234574421715715.post-19510393308791758192008-04-26T23:37:00.000-06:002008-04-26T23:37:00.000-06:00No advice, just (((hugs))). (Sounds like you got s...No advice, just (((hugs))). <BR/><BR/>(Sounds like you got some good advice anyways. I'm going to read it and try to remember it for when my boys are that age.)Beckyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18099953400373591844noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7278234574421715715.post-82050043681127836342008-04-26T21:41:00.000-06:002008-04-26T21:41:00.000-06:00Having BTDT - Yes I do agree to some extent that p...Having BTDT - Yes I do agree to some extent that parents like ourselves are "hyper vigilant". <BR/><BR/>That being said I feel that "experienced professionals like to say things like that to make us feel better. Not only that but sometimes those well deserving professionals just dont' know what to say/do.<BR/><BR/>Do I make any sense?<BR/><BR/>My opinion....just as it is. Honest, pure, full of garbage what ever you want to take it for..<BR/><BR/>Yes...I feel it is normal.<BR/>No...I don't think it is normal.<BR/>What is normal? I don't knwo.<BR/><BR/>I do know that my 5.5 yr old is rude, obnoxious, crude and funny all at once. His dad and I are not rude or crude or obnoxious. We dont' make farting noises w/our armpits during swimming lessons. We don't say "hey how far can you spit in this pool" and get the rest of the kids to follow suit.<BR/><BR/>Where does this come from...I ask myself.I have no clue.<BR/><BR/>Not only is my son "the above" things..he is also very funny, loving and full of mischief all at once. He makes me laugh and cry all at once. <BR/><BR/>He also has significant sensory integration defensiveness. Thankfully, "my" doctor saw something that wasn't right. She didn't listen to me when I said "It's okay __ It is just because of all the stress at home". She made an appt for him w/the pediatric neuropsychologist. She then called me to say "I hope you are not mad at me. I know you said xyz...but I just think something isn't right..." <BR/><BR/>Had we NEVER went to see that doctor I would be in a really bad spot w/this kid. <BR/><BR/>My advise....pull him in close. Pull him as close as you can. Attachment parenting (does great regardless if the child has attachment issues or not). Set VERY VERY CLEAR boundries. Those boundries get broke. Tough noogies. <BR/><BR/>What does he value? My 8.5 yr old daughter and 5.5 yr old son VALUE being able to have a tv in their room, their computer time and their gameboys. <BR/><BR/>You mess w/me? You embarrass me? ALL of those things are mine...for a day...keep it up...2 days....3 days? Want me to take the batteries and the plug? I've never got past 2 days w/Bry. Abi I did get to a week. H owever, it was one of those things that as "mom" I needed to rethink what "I" was doing. (((I AM NOT sayiing you need to do something different...just for me at that time)).<BR/><BR/>Abi remembers when Corry was in our home. She not to long ago told us she wanted to "go away for a few yrs like Corry did" because she didn't want to follow the rules. I was devastated and mad all at once. We gave it no attention and told her "no you have no choice..." and moved on.<BR/><BR/>Take a step back, deep breathe in and make a plan. Find what makes him tick?<BR/><BR/>Go to the library and get the book the "Out of Sync Child" or something like that...if you can't find it email me and let me know and i will get the exact name and author. It described bry to a t. after I read that and had a new game plan...we were doing better.<BR/><BR/>next week when i'm tired of his antics and ready to bean him..please remind me this. :O)<BR/><BR/>hang in there dear!!Story of our Lifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01617622682686871400noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7278234574421715715.post-82569105072369041662008-04-26T08:17:00.000-06:002008-04-26T08:17:00.000-06:00i don't have answers, but will check back to see w...i don't have answers, but will check back to see what sage advice you do get!<BR/><BR/>hang in there!Staceyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04051175511763977534noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7278234574421715715.post-58967634003028592972008-04-23T09:35:00.000-06:002008-04-23T09:35:00.000-06:00Hi Kimmy.Just want to let you know, I'm praying fo...Hi Kimmy.<BR/>Just want to let you know, I'm praying for you - I'll be emailing you.........<BR/>**hugs**Kristyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04870622906570955324noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7278234574421715715.post-60775275517068111762008-04-23T09:04:00.000-06:002008-04-23T09:04:00.000-06:00Kim, my heart goes out to you. I don't know what t...Kim, my heart goes out to you. I don't know what to say because my boys aren't of that age yet, and I don't know what all you experienced with Thomas. But I do know that you are really, really, way too hard on yourself. I'm reading this book right now titled "Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World" by Joanna Weaver. In it she talks about worry "So much depends on our perspective. If my God isn't bigger than life, then my life is bigger than God - and that's when anxiety takes over." She continues quoting Bill & Kathy Peel.."It's an interesting thing, the human mind, it can only focus on a couple of things at a time. When we're preoccupied with a problem and focus on our own inadequacy to handle it, there's really no room to add God to the picture. The ability to think rationally returns only when we refocus on God's adequacy." I just loved that. Kim, I challenge you to tell yourself everyday that you are Exactly the Mother that Mitchell, Ty and Thomas need. God placed you all together...don't say that your failing...God hasn't left the situation, He will get you through it and because He placed you there...you are perfect for the job because you have Him. That confidence will soon show to your boys too...who knows what could happen then...I will be praying for you Kim. (sorry about this being so long).The Walker Familyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05815063165662663099noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7278234574421715715.post-18102708566224376442008-04-23T08:14:00.000-06:002008-04-23T08:14:00.000-06:00I think all kids go through this "phase". One thi...I think all kids go through this "phase". One thing that worked with my older girls was to point out during this behavior how they would feel if I talked to them this way. I told them I never would because I love them and have respect for their feelings. If what you are doing doesn't work I always say to try something else. You are such a creative person I have no doubt it will come to you. You are a great mom. Don't doubt yourself. Have you read Dobson's Bringing Up Boys? That book is very reassuring I think.Brendahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05811548306583601019noreply@blogger.com